Parenting: it is Not for the faint at heart!
Anyone that has even a little experience with managing their time with kids would know that parenting is not for the faint of heart. Raising kids drains the fluids out of your brains. This is on a regular day in the life. Regular day, getting up, going with the routine, embracing loving moments with the little ones and handling he meltdowns with tact and care.
There are some events that you will face as a parent as your child is growing up. It involves a lot of researching, a lot of discussing, sometimes debating even arguing that ultimately leads to taking important decisions. Decisions like, what daycare/pre-school/school to choose for your kid? What activities to put them in to? How to be more present in your time with them while multi-tasking a million other things. The biggest decision to make is to decide what parenting “method” you and your partner feels is the best for your family. This is all a part of the package, and this is what you signed up for when you chose parenthood.
This is what is expected of your parenting journey. Your family, the society somewhat prepares you for this. You learn this by watching your parents doing it for you. This is the expected part of the process. There are plenty of helpful resources out there to help you at whatever step you’re stuck at.
Here comes the part on one can prepare you for. That’s because this are unique tricky situation that usually don’t find a mention in the parenting books.
Here is what we have faced so far that made us stronger as parents of our two strong girls in the past 5 years:
- That thermometer reading of 105.6
Kids do fall sick, that’s not the breaking news here. Some get their first experience with fever, cough, chills and stuffy nose. For us, it came when our first child was 10 months old. Started like is the tradition, runny nose and mild cough. Transformed into a fever over 105 degrees while puking out boiling hot breast-milk in the middle of the night. When you check the temperature on your baby’s tiny forehead, and it flashes 105.6 in your face; your first reaction is that there’s something wrong with this thermometer. You try taking the temperature the rectal way with a different fancier device and it confirms your fear, your child has a really high temperature. While we were resolving this, she started to shiver and in a way that can make a parent so stressed that another parent can only, possibly understand that. We call 911. First responders arrive. They give her a higher dose of Motrin as apparently Tylenol was not doing its job. Next day, early morning trip to the pediatrician reveals its UTI. It was downhill from there; we were swinging between giving her antibiotics and probiotics for the next few days and all was back to normal.
Have you heard about the saying, more studying, more confusion? That’s what happened next. I researched and read all about how antibiotics cause an irreparable damage to your body’s gut health. You feel guilt, no matter how hard to try to not feel that way. You turn holistic at the risk of being labelled as hippy (nothing wrong with being that I was just not where I am now at that time). Finding the right balance in just about everything even remotely related to parenting is not for the faint of heart. It takes a lot, A LOT, to come to an agreeable decision that is in the best interest of your family.
Any newer parent reading this, the worst of it always comes at middle of the night. Be as prepared as you can, in sickness and in health. It will be okay.
- That little pin-worm on our child’s bum saying hello to us in the middle of the night in my phone’s flashlight.
When we got introduced to this tiny, nasty little shits called pin-worm, I stumbled upon another mom’s bog where she said “You have not properly initiated into motherhood until you have worn a LEGO headlamp, armed yourself with strip of tape and gone on a pin-worm safari in your sleeping child’s pants! ((www.mamainthenow.com).
It all started with my child, who’s been sleeping for well over 4 hours at this point calls for me. I go in and she says, “I have an itchy bum”. My brain starts figuring out where the mildest body lotion can be found in the house as this has to be skin dryness from the long bath before bedtime. I tell her I will be back with some lotion. She says, “it’s bad”. I ask her if I can look once. I get my phone, turn the flashlight on to not wake her sister up sleeping in the next bed. To my absolute horror, I was greeted with 3 tiny, white thread like worms wiggling in the crack of her butt. The little monsters are called pin-worms as I later found out. Read all about level one-causes, treatment and prevention. Did the needful. Two weeks later, they showed up again. What I observed is, given the fact that how easily spreadable they are, my other daughter never had them. There was something that made one of my kids more susceptible than the other. This article gave some answers:
Yuck! Why Some People Get Worms and Some Don’t
Dietary changes along with excellent hygienic practices are the key to get of them for good. They do give you a mini heart attack the first time you discover them.
2. Teacher raising concerns
Have you ever gotten an email or a text message from your child’s teacher asking to set up a time with you to talk about some concerns she has regarding your child? That text/email is enough to give you sleepless night/s. It may be anything, ranging from but not limited to:
· Coping skills
· Readiness or a lack of it
· Learning disabilities
· and many more
Often, these concerns are accompanied by a referral with a specialist to help figure it out and take necessary steps, as needed, to improve things. Although in the long run, you realize this is in the best interest of your child and your child’s teacher is a part of the village from the famous phrase “it takes a village” and are there to help you in your parenting journey; it is not easy. You fear if your child is going to get labelled, you fear the what ifs. Its takes patience and a lot of learning and unlearning from your side to get through this.
3. That big deer tick on digging face down in her forehead one school morning.
This by far has scared the most shit out of me. We got back from a woody house camping trip at the end of the spring break and the first morning back to school, discovered a “bump” on my child’s forehead while brushing her hair. Closer look revealed the bump was a tick buried head down in her forehead. Mind fucked! I pulled it out while that tick was using all it’s might to stay inside. Finally, got it out. It is engorged from all the blood it had sucked. My instinct told me to keep it, so I looked for something, frantically. Could only manage to find a zip lock back. Did a quick internet search, it did look like the bad kind of tick, deer tick, the one that is responsible for giving humans Lyme disease. Got that bloody tick parcel packed to be sent for testing for the disease while checking my daughter for fever and rashes. To be on the safe side, while waiting for the results, got her on a homeopathic medicine for tick bites called Ledum Palusture while pumping up her intake of Vitamins C&D. You may have figured out by now that I am not a fan of antibiotics, but I would choose a leaky gut over Lyme disease any day. The results came back negative, thanking our stars every single day for that but that was stressful, to say the least.
And counting. There will be challenges, as they’re growing up. I may comeback and update here.
There is a lot that of you that it takes to put in the job of parenting. Whenever you see someone with kids, smile at them. You never know what they maybe going through-from simple to very complex.